Morning person

I use the excuse that I am not a morning person but afternoon ineptness is getting the better of me so I must now claim to operate in multiple time zones.

Pain is all in the mind

Today I trapped my finger under the hydraulic clamp of a guillotine. Now this should have removed my finger totally but I was operating the clamp with the foot pedal and not the hydraulics.

So what I really did was stamp hard on the foot pedal that brought down the heavy clamp onto my own finger - this is perhaps even more stupid than via hydraulics but fortunately, stupid as it was, I still have a finger.

I danced around the room until the pain subsided enough for me to scream and a friend fetched ice for me. One person asked if there should not be some kind of mechanism to prevent this happening and I said "there is a mechanism, it is called a brain, sadly I did not have it turned on". haha.

I said "pain is all in the mind, but unfortunately I keep my mind in my finger so it hurts like fuck".

If more of us valued food and cheer and song above hoarded gold, it would be a merrier world.

-- J.R.R. Tolkien

Someone killed, something tragic, something wonderful and something magic..

have all happened a million times before over millennia.

Don't sweat the small stuff and also note that, given time, the big stuff is small stuff too.

expensive shit

My wife's boss was trying to show off at work today.

"Hey I'm off work soon, you will all have to work harder"

"Why? Where are you going?"

"My girlfriend and I have our 3 year anniversary, she booked a $600 meal for us."

"And afterwards you will do a poo" my wife replied uninterestedly.

up's and down's

Don't judge a whole year by just one day.